Start small, aim low, go slow

Laura Gassner Otting running in London Marathon in front of Buckingham Palace

Here we are deep into the first month of the last quarter of the year.

2024 is almost over, and already you can hear the screaming swarms of snake-oil success salesmen, cajoling you to go big in 2025.

They are going to tell you to crush it, to lean in, to 10x everything. And, you know what?

They aren’t wrong.

But they are also going to tell you to rise and grind, with earlier wake ups and colder showers. (Speaking of colder showers, here is an absolute corker of a video of Spartan Race founder Joe DeSena reviewing Limitless.)

And, with the one exception of Joe, I’m going to tell you this: they’re super wrong about how to achieve these big, huge, hairy, audacious goals.

Last week, someone told me that I was contagiously audacious. So, please know that I’m not going to tell you to shrink your goals. In fact, quite the opposite; I want your goals to be even bigger. I’m a firm believer that if your goals don’t scare just a little bit of the crap out of you, then they aren’t goals, they are just tasks.

To wit: I just signed up to run the Tokyo Marathon on March 2, 2025. It will be the sixth of the six major marathons, and it comes with a pretty sweet medal and a lifetime of big huge bragging rights. I’ve also promised myself that I’m going to do big huge things in media next year, while also writing my next book (which I hope will be big huge, too).

The secret to achieving those big huge earth-shattering goals, the scary-as-hell dream — well, it’s like running a marathon — is one tiny baby bird step at a time.

Rounding mile 26 of 26.2, by Buckingham Palace, with swag from a keynote I gave around my waist. (Hey, it’s great swag. I wanted to keep it post-race!)

The slimy success salesmen are wrong. You don’t have to go big to be big. Actually, to have something big, you’ve got to go small.

Lower the bar. Start small, aim low, go slow.

Yeah, baby, you read that right. Look at the floor, can you see your goals down there in the distance? If so, they are too high. I’m not just talking floor or basement. I’m talking sub-basement, the cellar, the hidden room under the foundation.

Want to lose 100 pounds? Lose one pound this week.
Want to run an ultramarathon? Walk a mile today.
Want to become a confident dancer? Do a two step in front of your dog tonight. (I haven’t taught my #dailydober to dance yet but she can give hugs!)

We all start somewhere, and the inflexible pursuit of perfection lines the road to goal attainment with potholes and tire-spikes. In fact, if we set “the new normal” as perfection and perfection alone, the minute we fall off the wagon we relapse and lose all progress, label ourselves complete and utter failures, and pack it in until next Dec 31. But not this time.

Starting small, aiming low, and going slow allows for resetting and restarting. Tomorrow is a new day and it’s time to start.

But, I Should Get My Act Together Before the End of the Year, Shouldn’t I?

This time of year they are all over our social media feeds yelling about how there are less than 100 days left in the year. The Productivity Police are almost as bad as the Success Salesmen, trying to inspire (bully) you to get your act together, to get moving, to crush all the goals that you’ve procrastinated up until now.

But it doesn’t inspire me. It just makes me anxious. I feel my heart rate rise, and my mood fall. I feel immediately behind, and immediately like I can never catch up.

Why Dec 31? And, for that matter, why do we wait until Jan 1 to start something new?

Why not June 1? Why not the start of the new school year? Why not your birthday? Why not this very Truesday?

Let me release you from these delusional deadlines.
Let me release you from these random races.
Let me release you from these arbitrary endpoints.

Because here is what I know to be true: You can start at any time. You can stop at any time. And the only race you need to be running is your own.

Psst.. also, Motivation is Not the Secret!

As I’m training for this new marathon, I have to get up and run all these runs in the middle of the week when it’s dark and sleeting (I live in Boston and the race is in early March, you do the winter math). I can assure you that if I’m headed out there alone, I’m headed back into my cozy bed. I’m not going to do it. I’m just not. But If I’m meeting you at 4:30am and I’m tired and everything hurts, you’d best believe I’ll be there with bells on.

Motivation is this fantastical well that you wake up and dip your hand into, hoping that it never runs dry. But, my well is menopausal. (Let me know if you got that joke.) So, I need to go elsewhere for the fountain of go-get-it. And, that elsewhere? The fear of letting someone down. Because accountability beats motivation every single day.

I shared a few more shifts you can make when approaching your goals with Kit Hoover and Mario Lopez on Access Hollywood.

Limitlessly yours,
LGO

Hello Truesday

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